STIFF NECKED FOOLS
I would wish to start with The Chronicles of a Failed Friendship, starring yours faithfully. Let's put it this way. You have a fantastic idea as regards which direction to follow in life and naturally, you first share it with your best friend. Against expectations, they question the idea. So it went, since they don’t support your idea, they don’t support you and should not be part of you. Without further ado, you cut off the relationship, you stop seeing them, no more calls or texts. You don’t get to hear their side of the story or put your opinion on the table for a careful objective examination by both of you. That Ego! They either take your way or the highway. Full stop. Even without informing them of your decision, you just go mute. After that, time flies out, one month to two months, three months. Shortly after, it is six months. After that time, the devil has oozed out from your head and you realise that you may not have treated this person very good. You come back to your senses and then you're back looking for them. By that time, they have had a depressive time not understanding why a small issue like not supporting your idea would make you cut off the relationship completely, more so without an objective discussion. You finally seek their audience. They forgive you but want no further relationship. You did hurt them so bad, and they can’t stand another possibility for the same. Eventually, both of you decide to end it there and Wish each other best of luck in future. You lose the friend for your ego. Wiser today, I look back at the incident and ask myself, why could someone not just say exactly what was making them unhappy? Why do people assume to know exactly what is on the other person’s mind, the exact plans they have and go ahead to make decision based on what is on the other person’s mind? This breed of high ego fellows is a stubborn lot to relate to. It is either you are having it their way or you take the highway.
And so goes the story of Hard Heads. They lose friends on the way, loose business deals and chances but cannot lower their pride. They can’t keep relationships. They are serial relationships breakers.
Let's talk about the twin brother to Hardhead. His name is. Ego. Just as the eagle soars to a pressure free zone above currents looking down on other earthlings, just as eagle has strong eyesight to spot prey and is strong defenders of territory, so is Ego humans. It does not matter who they are dealing with, and it becomes worse if you get married to one of them. They soar above everyone to a place of no competition, a pressure free place where only their opinion is important. They have a strong eyesight and already can see clearly, even what their partners are thinking and planning. They know their partners are tied up to them and cannot go anywhere and will always be at their mercy. They know that you are likely to go home and have already influenced even your parents or they exactly know how to fish you out from there. The egos are also very territorial. You never win any argument against them. Even if they realize along the way that they could be wrong, they never cede ground but stick to their guns until you surrender, talk of eagle mentality (read Ego mentality). The sad thing is that these Ego partners stick to their position until they have no partner left to ego over. In the end, they come running to save it but sadly realize that the house is completely burnt down to ashes and there remains nothing to save. They regret but only ki-inside-inside. They cannot admit failure because they never fail. The wise man in the city of Proverbs, street 10 and house NO. 21 had a brush of shoulders with these guys for he said, “The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of sense.” They would rather die than see the sense from your side. Sense is only from their side. About being a fool and dying, of course I have personally died once, twice or perhaps three times. Only that I have promised myself not to die the fourth time because I can’t be a fool for the whole of my life. No.
There is another crop of egos that we need to talk about. These guys who are either university graduates with good jobs or not so learned but successful businesspeople. They have good cars, beautiful families and good investment portfolios. Their children are in private schools. These guys have simply arrived. They usually have little or nothing to do with guys on the other divide; family members who did not work hard enough to make it in life, hopeless fellow citizen that never took life serious eventually settling their families in not so good neighbourhoods, children going to the hopeless public schools. The crop of egos here never miss chance to show who the boss is. They are very careful that their children don’t interact with the hopeless children from public schools, who don’t speak English. They don’t dare leave their children with the hopeless upcountry relatives to prevent them being infected with hopelessness. They avoid family meetings and when in attendance, they avoid eating in homes of those hopeless relatives and quickly drive off with their children to treat them to KFCs chips and chicken. These Egos are even worse animals if they are born again Christians, they know God, are blessed and sometimes ascribe their success to knowing God very well. Added to the list of these Egos are pastors and priests who like to be worshipped by their congregants. All these guys are just living the life and are proud to have worked for it. These Egos are usually unreachable and sometimes even ignore most poorer peers who come looking for them in their offices. They are practically untouchable. I'm sorry for you if you try to call or write a text message to these people. They will simply not pick calls and will not respond to text messages. The better Egos will respond to messages after 2-3 days, week or month. Of course, they are very busy people focussed on doing important things in life and avoid distraction from the hopeless quarters through meaningless calls or messages. Their fellow Egos are treated good. Their calls picked on 1st ring and messages are responded to instantly. Of course, they live in the same neighbourhood and children visit the same schools. For the sake of peace, stop looking for these people just look for your fellow hopeless birds of a feather and flock together. Sometimes I ask myself a question, really? How long does it take to respond to a text message? And if these guys are as busy, why not employ a PA to handle their communication? These guys are popularly known as middle class and behave the same way when it comes to politics. Their affairs are well fixed, and it does not matter to them how the country is governed. These guys are respected by their people and could influence the politics of our land but because their lives are well ordered, they don’t care for the rest of the citizen. If I had the power. I would put all of them in a lorry and Christopher Columbus style, discover a country for them and throw them there together with their riches and families. We don’t need them in this country and of course they don’t need us. That is the only way we can change this country.
The great Bob Marley also had an encounter with this kind of people. He felt denied of his simplicity; he felt that those people were always unavailable chasing vanity. They have the wrong interpretation and vain imagination as regards the meaning of life and what is important in life. This is what he sang,
Stiff necked fools, you think you're cool
To deny me for simplicity
Yes you have gone, for so long
With your love for vanity now
Yes you have got the wrong interpretation
Mixed up with vain imagination
Should I talk of that situation where your friend went mute no longer calling or sending text. You did the same and you all arrived at catch 22 situation where you are too proud to go first and find out why your friend went mute. You tell yourself that even they should look for you. If pride continues, the friendship weakens or simply breaks.
Should I give the story of this lady whose husband discovered that she had cheated on him and without remorse goes ahead to justify her sexual escapades with her boss. That it had afforded her the promotion, that she was now feeding the family because the hubby’s job was not paying very well. She wondered why the hubby was mad when she was even paying rent and had transferred the children to private school, paying handsome amounts as fees. She didn’t understand why the hubby was mad.
In my world tour, I came to a country that we can call D. D is a different place where patience and courtesy is the culture that close to all people abide by. No one fights to enter a public vehicle or for food in a queue, a speeding car will slow down to allow a pedestrian to pass or be overtaken by another vehicle, it is cultural to respond to all messages, calls and emails. It looks awkward when you don’t. Back home, how many times do we almost cause an accident as we prove to fellow road users that we had the right of way sometimes by opening the window to hurl insultive F words on Kenyan roads? The pride, unbelievable!!!
I need not say more but just before their fall, please remind these guys what the wise man said in Proverbs 16:18, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall,"
If only we would all choose to be more humans not to look down on anyone especially the not so lucky in life……. Life would be lived better. We just need to be more humane. Shall we?
@stephen Mungai
And so goes the story of Hard Heads. They lose friends on the way, loose business deals and chances but cannot lower their pride. They can’t keep relationships. They are serial relationships breakers.
Let's talk about the twin brother to Hardhead. His name is. Ego. Just as the eagle soars to a pressure free zone above currents looking down on other earthlings, just as eagle has strong eyesight to spot prey and is strong defenders of territory, so is Ego humans. It does not matter who they are dealing with, and it becomes worse if you get married to one of them. They soar above everyone to a place of no competition, a pressure free place where only their opinion is important. They have a strong eyesight and already can see clearly, even what their partners are thinking and planning. They know their partners are tied up to them and cannot go anywhere and will always be at their mercy. They know that you are likely to go home and have already influenced even your parents or they exactly know how to fish you out from there. The egos are also very territorial. You never win any argument against them. Even if they realize along the way that they could be wrong, they never cede ground but stick to their guns until you surrender, talk of eagle mentality (read Ego mentality). The sad thing is that these Ego partners stick to their position until they have no partner left to ego over. In the end, they come running to save it but sadly realize that the house is completely burnt down to ashes and there remains nothing to save. They regret but only ki-inside-inside. They cannot admit failure because they never fail. The wise man in the city of Proverbs, street 10 and house NO. 21 had a brush of shoulders with these guys for he said, “The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of sense.” They would rather die than see the sense from your side. Sense is only from their side. About being a fool and dying, of course I have personally died once, twice or perhaps three times. Only that I have promised myself not to die the fourth time because I can’t be a fool for the whole of my life. No.
There is another crop of egos that we need to talk about. These guys who are either university graduates with good jobs or not so learned but successful businesspeople. They have good cars, beautiful families and good investment portfolios. Their children are in private schools. These guys have simply arrived. They usually have little or nothing to do with guys on the other divide; family members who did not work hard enough to make it in life, hopeless fellow citizen that never took life serious eventually settling their families in not so good neighbourhoods, children going to the hopeless public schools. The crop of egos here never miss chance to show who the boss is. They are very careful that their children don’t interact with the hopeless children from public schools, who don’t speak English. They don’t dare leave their children with the hopeless upcountry relatives to prevent them being infected with hopelessness. They avoid family meetings and when in attendance, they avoid eating in homes of those hopeless relatives and quickly drive off with their children to treat them to KFCs chips and chicken. These Egos are even worse animals if they are born again Christians, they know God, are blessed and sometimes ascribe their success to knowing God very well. Added to the list of these Egos are pastors and priests who like to be worshipped by their congregants. All these guys are just living the life and are proud to have worked for it. These Egos are usually unreachable and sometimes even ignore most poorer peers who come looking for them in their offices. They are practically untouchable. I'm sorry for you if you try to call or write a text message to these people. They will simply not pick calls and will not respond to text messages. The better Egos will respond to messages after 2-3 days, week or month. Of course, they are very busy people focussed on doing important things in life and avoid distraction from the hopeless quarters through meaningless calls or messages. Their fellow Egos are treated good. Their calls picked on 1st ring and messages are responded to instantly. Of course, they live in the same neighbourhood and children visit the same schools. For the sake of peace, stop looking for these people just look for your fellow hopeless birds of a feather and flock together. Sometimes I ask myself a question, really? How long does it take to respond to a text message? And if these guys are as busy, why not employ a PA to handle their communication? These guys are popularly known as middle class and behave the same way when it comes to politics. Their affairs are well fixed, and it does not matter to them how the country is governed. These guys are respected by their people and could influence the politics of our land but because their lives are well ordered, they don’t care for the rest of the citizen. If I had the power. I would put all of them in a lorry and Christopher Columbus style, discover a country for them and throw them there together with their riches and families. We don’t need them in this country and of course they don’t need us. That is the only way we can change this country.
The great Bob Marley also had an encounter with this kind of people. He felt denied of his simplicity; he felt that those people were always unavailable chasing vanity. They have the wrong interpretation and vain imagination as regards the meaning of life and what is important in life. This is what he sang,
Stiff necked fools, you think you're cool
To deny me for simplicity
Yes you have gone, for so long
With your love for vanity now
Yes you have got the wrong interpretation
Mixed up with vain imagination
Should I talk of that situation where your friend went mute no longer calling or sending text. You did the same and you all arrived at catch 22 situation where you are too proud to go first and find out why your friend went mute. You tell yourself that even they should look for you. If pride continues, the friendship weakens or simply breaks.
Should I give the story of this lady whose husband discovered that she had cheated on him and without remorse goes ahead to justify her sexual escapades with her boss. That it had afforded her the promotion, that she was now feeding the family because the hubby’s job was not paying very well. She wondered why the hubby was mad when she was even paying rent and had transferred the children to private school, paying handsome amounts as fees. She didn’t understand why the hubby was mad.
In my world tour, I came to a country that we can call D. D is a different place where patience and courtesy is the culture that close to all people abide by. No one fights to enter a public vehicle or for food in a queue, a speeding car will slow down to allow a pedestrian to pass or be overtaken by another vehicle, it is cultural to respond to all messages, calls and emails. It looks awkward when you don’t. Back home, how many times do we almost cause an accident as we prove to fellow road users that we had the right of way sometimes by opening the window to hurl insultive F words on Kenyan roads? The pride, unbelievable!!!
I need not say more but just before their fall, please remind these guys what the wise man said in Proverbs 16:18, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall,"
If only we would all choose to be more humans not to look down on anyone especially the not so lucky in life……. Life would be lived better. We just need to be more humane. Shall we?
@stephen Mungai
No comments:
Post a Comment